Thursday, September 17, 2009

Kissing an Ant's Butt











I was coerced by a large man in uniform yesterday to put my tongue on an ant’s butt. Despite what you might think, I’m not a suspected terrorist being subjected to enhanced interrogation techniques.

One of many great experiences yesterday as we toured the Daintree Ranforest, a World Heritage-listed National Park that comprises one of the largest swaths of tropical rainforest left intact in the world, with some of the oldest surviving plant and animal species known to man. The scenery is spectacular and unspoiled. Some of the most pristine beaches and dense, seemingly untouched rainforest that you’ll find anywhere in the world. The region is unique because it’s literally the only place in the world where tropical rainforest meets the beach. The combination creates some incredibly beautiful places along the coast near Cape Tribulation where gorgeous, green mountains cascade down to perfect white sand beaches. It feels very close to paradise – as long as you don’t get in the water between November and May, when the shoreline is inundated with lethal box jellyfish. This part of the world is a conundrum. Spectacular natural beauty, combined with lots of critters who can do some major damage to the unwary. Examples include saltwater crocodiles that take out one or two folks each year who decide to cool off in the wrong swimming hole, the aforementioned jellyfish with a sting that many don’t survive for the length of time it takes to get out of the water, some of the most poisonous snakes in the world, and even a “stinging tree”, with a combination of histamines and neurotoxins that will cause some memorable pain for months if you just brush against the leaves or grab hold of the stem. Look but don’t touch (or swim in) unless cleared by a reliable local is a good rule of thumb.

We went on a small group tour with Australian Wild Escapes, a company known in my industry as the Rolls Royce of day touring Down Under. Our guide (the uniformed man mentioned above), Rick, was incredible - an extraordinary level of knowledge on all things rainforest, and a fun guy, too. We learned about anything and everything, all while having a great time – how to throw a boomerang and not hurt yourself or others (see photo…I’m not ready to turn pro yet), tricks for spotting tons of camouflaged animals throughout the forest, the best place to see saltwater crocodiles and how not to piss them off, and generally information about the plant and animal life as we hiked through the forest that made it come alive. It was a phenomenal day.

Back to the ant for a moment. Rick taught us several techniques used by the aboriginals to tap the rainforest for their day-to-day needs; everything from crushing the leaves of a particular plant to make soap to using rocks to make dye (ochre). The most alarming was a tree colony of green ants he found. Apparently the acid secreted by green ants to sting their foes also tastes sort of lemony and is a great source of vitamin C. Then, to our small group’s surprise, Rick took one of the ants, and touched what could only be its bum to the tip of his tongue. We recoiled, though he looked faintly pleased. Then, using a second ant, he reached its hind end toward my mouth and said “here, Robert, you try…taste it!” Of course, my head turned away so quickly it’s a miracle that I’m not wearing a brace today. I could see the disappointment coupled with a slight, knowing satisfaction in Rick’s eyes (Rick’s a great guy…I couldn’t resist the dramatic turn of phrase, though). Hating to step back from a challenge, and when it became apparent that I was the only one in our little group who was too wimpy to taste the ant, I went for it. Mmmm…lemony!! Surprisingly, all ants survived the encounter, though there’s probably some significant therapy in store for them after that close brush.

And Rick was a real trooper in trying to track down the elusive cassowary. They’re up there, and he’s seen them – there are even “cassowary crossing” signs on the road – but, alas, no cassowary yesterday. Drat. I’ll have to pop into a wildlife park if I want to see one, but at least I tried my best.

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